How to Have a Long-Distance Relationship That Works

How to Have a Long-Distance Relationship That Works

They say absence makes the heart grow fonder, but long-distance relationships can feel lonely and even painful. These partnerships require extra effort to ensure you and your significant other feel secure, loved, and fulfilled. Luckily, the modern world provides a range of ways to stay connected, even from afar.

If you’re committed to making it through, long-distance relationships can be filled with care, dependability, and support. Here are some tips to make your long-distance relationship last.

1. Don’t Neglect Your Sex LifeDon’t Neglect Your Sex Life

Even if you’re not together in person for a good time, you still have options to keep the relationship spicy. Try sending flirtatious texts that will make your partner feel desired. You also might take advantage of ways modern technology, like video chats, could help you feel even more sexually connected.

While getting swept up in all the fun is easy, don’t forget to take care of your sexual health. Remember to keep up your birth control plan even if you’re not having sex regularly. Consistency is especially important if you are taking hormonal birth control pills.

2. Always Have Your Next Visit on the Calendar

Knowing when you will see each other in person again gives you both something to look forward to. Try always to have the next in-person visit marked on the calendar. A lack of clarity could make the time apart feel even longer and more complex.

Counting down the days provides a level of excitement that makes all the time apart feel well worth it. However, be mindful of one partner always having to go the extra mile to make your time together happen. While it’s always hard to make it equal, be sure you are putting in comparable time, money, and energy.

3. Communicate Your NeedsCommunicate Your Needs

Communication is essential to any healthy relationship and is particularly crucial when you and your boo live far apart. Open, honest, and frequent conversations should be standard in your partnership. Your relationship should allow both parties to feel safe expressing their thoughts and feelings.

Don’t be afraid to speak up if you feel disconnected or your needs aren’t being fulfilled. Unexpressed needs are a recipe for resentment and could damage your connection. These negative feelings could build up even more than usual if you already have to deal with the physical separation.

4. Understand Both of Your Love Languages and Attachment Styles

Attachment styles and love languages are an inside look at how your partner feels most cared for. You also want to communicate with others to make you feel loved. Take a quiz to see if you need quality time, words of affirmation, acts of service, physical touch, and gift-giving. Then discuss if you require additional measures to ensure these needs are being met from afar.

The most common attachment styles are secure, anxious, avoidant, and disorganized. Being apart could increase how intensely a partner is leaning into their attachment approach. Distance is especially tough on those with an anxious attachment style. An extra bit of assurance can make your partner feel loved and supported.

5. Schedule Regular FaceTime or Skype CallsFaceTime or Skype Calls

Old-school phone calls and back-and-forth texting isn’t always going to cut it. However, video chatting can make you feel more connected to your significant other. In addition, you will be able to pick up on the facial expressions you miss out on with regular calls and texts.

FaceTime also can grow the physical attraction you feel toward your partner. Seeing their face is a sweet reminder of their cute smile and how they light up when talking to you. Try to schedule some video calls throughout the week and sprinkle in some spontaneous catch-ups.

6. Consider Couples Counseling

Counseling benefits any couple and could be extra helpful if you’re long-distance. Modern advances make it possible to see a professional without making an in-office visit. Virtual therapy sessions provide the same space to work out potential issues and discuss what works for your relationship.

Therapy is a safe place to discuss the goals of your partnership. Chances are you and your boo don’t want to be long-distance forever. Your therapist guides you through the complexities of these conversations and helps you uncover what you hope for the future.

7. Nurture Other Parts of Your LifeLive Your Life a Quote on a Cup

No relationship can meet your every want and need. Long-distance relationships are especially limited when it comes to fulfilling all of your social needs. You should continually focus energy on nurturing other parts of your life outside your partnership, like your career and friendships.

Make sure to prioritize plenty of social hangouts, like grabbing coffee with your friends or having dinner with family. You could use your alone time to dive into a fun hobby or learn a new skill. Having separate lives and hobbies would still be crucial even if you and your significant other lived together.

Going the Distance

All partnerships require effort and commitment if they’re going to last. However, long-distance relationships take that intention to the next level. While physical separation is challenging, it doesn’t have to mean you can’t feel connected to your significant other.

Finding ways to make your partner feel loved and appreciated helps strengthen your relationship. Be on the lookout for small and big ways to show your love. Devotion can be expressed by a quick, thoughtful message or by planning a fantastic trip for some much-needed quality time. Through it all, remember the love that stays in your heart even when you all are far apart.

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