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Keeping Spark with Proven Strategies for Long-Lasting Love & Connection in Marriage

A Happy Couple
A Happy Couple Cerebrating

When you meet that special someone who you plan to spend the rest of your life with, it can be an incredible experience. The two of you decide to commit to each other with love, support, and care for as long as you both shall live.

However, we all know that divorce rates are still pretty high, even if they are starting to decrease little by little. Marriage is not a walk in the park or an endless fairytale of happy times. It takes work to maintain a healthy marriage, and you have to decide every day to love your spouse.

As the years go by, it is not uncommon for that spark to disappear. The honeymoon phase could last for a few months or several years, but eventually, you may start to settle into rhythms that simply uphold the status quo. Couples can grow apart for various reasons, so putting in the work to maintain, or reclaim, that spark is crucial.

Work Through StressReduce Stress

Stress can be one of the top reasons why a marriage falls apart. The source of the stress could be finances, parenting disputes, misaligned principles, poor communication, or many other issues. Ignoring the effects of stress and minimizing it may cause resentment to grow, which can eventually degrade the intimacy of the marriage. Handling stress in a relationship is important if you want to continue growing closer to each other, no matter how long you have been married. You could attend therapy together, spend some time apart to reset, or commit to speaking up when your needs are not being met.

Never Stop Dating

Never Stop Dating and Go as Long as You Can

You have probably heard this advice before, but people still do not take it seriously. If you simply exist in the same household as your spouse, improving your relationship will be very hard. It requires cultivation. One way to cultivate this relationship is to keep going on dates. Go out to dinner every once in a while to a nice restaurant. Spend an evening at home watching a movie you both like with some movie snacks and low lighting. Head to a festival or concert together for a new experience. Take a walk in a nearby state park or through downtown and hold hands while you do. Dating should always continue, even if you have been with your spouse for 50 years.

Take Care of Your BodyA girl in a garden

As much as we like to say that we care more about the inside than the outside, attraction plays a big role in a marriage. While we tend to become more attracted to our spouses over time, not taking care of ourselves could be a quick way to lose that aspect of the relationship. Caring for our wellness is good for longevity, but it also demonstrates that we are willing to put in effort for our loved ones. Remember the importance of a balanced diet and regular exercise. Take care of your oral hygiene to make your smile fresh and bright. Use an exfoliating scrub to replenish moisture in your skin and reduce the size of pores. Little habits can go a long way in self-care, and this devotion to caring for yourself will keep the attraction aspect a priority.

Try New Things Together

A Couple Try New Things Together
A Couple Try New Things Together

Adventure can bring people together. When you are in an unfamiliar setting with your spouse, you are forced to rely on each other for comfort. New experiences can form fresh memories and fun stories that revitalize your relationship. You may travel to a new country where English is not the primary language. Heading to a cultural festival and trying new foods can also be an exciting adventure on a smaller scale. An adrenaline rush from tandem bungee jumping or ziplining through the trees could be the spark of excitement your marriage needs. Even taking a simple ballroom dance class would bring the two of you closer together. Choose something outside of your comfort zone to try together.

Commit to Serving One Another

Acts of service is one of the five main love languages. However, it should be something that everyone brings to their marriage. The little things can have a big impact on the health of your relationship, and the passage of time could make those things fall by the wayside. Commit to serving one another more to reclaim the spark in your marriage. Love is a verb, and acts of service are a great way to display that love. Do the dishes before your spouse has to ask. Offer to watch the kids for the day solo so your spouse can do something they enjoy. Cook up one of their favorite meals when they have had an exhausting week. These little actions will build up your love for one another.

Never Stop Working on the Marriage

A Couple Enjoy an Evening Under the Tree
A Couple Enjoy an Evening Under the Tree

If you have been married for a long time and that spark has gone out, it could be due to a lack of effort from one or both of you. Talk about your needs, hear the needs of your loved one, and commit to working on your marriage with some of the ideas mentioned above.

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